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It's November and with that comes pumpkin pie, changing leaves, cute scarves and lastly, broken hearts. As pessimistic as that sounds, I'm afraid I speak the truth for many freshmen.
Because of the long distance, coming to college with a boyfriend or girlfriend is tricky and the end of the semester seems to be the breaking point for many relationships.
After high school graduation, a common question for couples is, "Now what?" The conversation about what to do next - "Should we try to make it work?" and "How often will we see each other?" - is inevitable. Many times, couples think they are capable of making it work when they separate to go to college, but with the many distractions at school, staying together is easier said than done.
September and October seem to be the easiest of the months. Things are working out all right. Phone calls in between classes are a must and AIM becomes a best friend. In November, things get a little tougher and the struggle to make the relationship work seems to get harder and harder. It's not easy to live completely different lives and still manage to keep things strong.
I definitely consider myself a romantic. Who doesn't love the story of high school sweethearts that have been together forever and will live happily ever after? I, for one, was a believer that things could work out and if a couple worked hard enough and cared enough, they could stay together forever. But the harsh truth is, it isn't that easy.
There's a difference between high school sweethearts and having a boyfriend or girlfriend from high school. A high school sweetheart is your first love, someone who you would consider a companion through the majority of high school. Having a boyfriend or girlfriend going into college is a less serious relationship - two people are happy together but perhaps aren't in love or maybe haven't been together long enough.
Having a significant other when going into college is hard. I'd go as far as saying it's nearly impossible - unless you're high school sweethearts. Only then does the relationship stand a chance, and even then, it's a matter of holding onto hope and having trust, patience, consistently good communication skills and free Verizon-to-Verizon phone minutes.
College is a time to be independent and find yourself. It's a time to meet new people and learn new things about yourself and the world. It's a time to broaden your horizons and be spontaneous. This is all tricky to do when you're constantly working on a long-distance relationship and worrying about someone who is miles away.
If a relationship is meant to work out, it will. Taking a break in a relationship to live and learn is healthy. Ending a relationship while things are rough is better than prolonging it until you find a reason to hate one another. Keeping things friendly between an ex-girlfriend or ex-boyfriend is ideal and perhaps it could leave things open to a future relationship down the road.
The "Boy Meets World" relationship of Cory and Topanga is nice to think about but far-fetched. High school relationships lasting in college unfortunately doesn't always happen. It's worth a try, but if the going gets tough, my suggestion is to end it while it's still civil.
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